Who the #### was Paul?

My train warrant arrived in the post and it made me nervous, it was a one-way ticket from home to Lympstone Commando, the train station that disgorges you at the bottom of the camp. As you sit on the train you can see the assault course on one side of the platform and the mud flats of the estuary on the other. In time I would get to know both very well. I’d not really gone far from my hometown, perhaps to Wales for a caravan holiday in Rhyl but generally that was about it. It was fascinating watching the country speed by as I contemplated the next stage of my life trying to become a Bootneck.

Would I be able to finish the 30 weeks of training? Could I pass the Command Tests and perhaps more importantly could I iron a shirt properly? In case you were wondering, the answers are yes, yes and no not really. So the train stops at Bristol Temple Meads station and a man named Paul gets on and sits opposite me and we start a conversation. He asked if I was going on holiday. Yes sort of, I reply before telling him I was off to join the marines. Ok he says and reveals that he has been a pongo⁠2 for several years and he proceeds to offers me lots of advice. Now remember that I entered recruit training in the early 90’s so I have forgotten most of what he said but the one thing I remember him saying is to have two sets of toiletries. One set for daily use and the other that you never use and just bring out for inspections. Now at the time I thought that this was pretty pointless advice until I found the contents of my locker strewn around the room because the Drill Instructor wasn’t happy that my razor was still wet.

The point of this dit⁠ is that you should always listen to the advice of people who have actually been doing the job for a while. In my case Paul, which is his real name by the way, saved me hours of preparation once I decided to follow his advice. What you should do is seek out experienced colleagues and take their advice because they have already found out what does and doesn’t work.

1 Bootneck, Royal Marine. Origins of the word is still disputed, some claim it is to do with the cutting out of boot tongues and putting the leather down the collars to prevent having the throats slit. May also relate to the fact that the Royal Marines often walk (yomp) for miles to their objectives.

2 Pongo, member of the Army, due to the belief that they do not wash often e.g. where ever the Army goes the pong goes.

3 Dit, story, normally embellished